We are what we say
If anything reveals our double-mindedness and fractured hearts, it is our tongues, speech, and the words we speak. There is a direct connection between the heart and the mouth.
Occasionally, someone will say or do something that seems completely out of character for them, so we jokingly or seriously ask, “Who are you?” We might say, “I don’t even know you anymore.”
Well, in a roundabout way, James is asking the church the same question throughout his epistle. Who are you? Are you a friend of God, as Abraham was, or are you a friend of the world? Do you love God? Do you love his word? Do you love his people? You would likely say yes to all of these questions, but there are things you are doing (or not doing) that would indicate something else altogether. So, who are you?
The wheat and weeds grow together
Now, James is well aware that he might be speaking to a mixed audience. On the one hand, there could be people in the church who appear double-minded because they are not sincere Christians. Jesus told the parable of the wheat and the weeds, where a farmer’s enemy comes and sows weeds or tares in his wheat field. And the farmer’s servants ask whether they should pull the weeds. And the farmer says:
No. When you pull up the weeds, you might also uproot the wheat with them. Let both grow together until the harvest. At harvest time I’ll tell the reapers: Gather the weeds first and tie them in bundles to burn them, but collect the wheat in my barn. (Matthew 13:29, 30)
So, James is well aware that there could be false disciples in the church. But his response to them is not, “Get out.” Instead, he patiently and lovingly encourages repentance. He exposes the hypocrisy and encourages them to draw near to God (Jas 4:8). In chapter 4, he says, “Cleanse your hands, sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.”
Why doesn’t he simply tell them to get out? Well, first of all, he doesn’t want them to leave. He wants them to repent. He wants them to turn to Christ and be saved. That’s the heart of God, right? In 2 Peter 3, Peter writes, “The Lord … is patient with you, not wanting any to perish but all to come to repentance” (2Pe 3:9).
Second, there’s also the matter of our finite judgment. The elect of God do not have a big E stamped on their foreheads. Sometimes, the wheat and the weeds can look very similar to one another. That’s why the farmer in Jesus’s parable told his servants, “When you pull up the weeds, you might also uproot the wheat with them. Let both grow together until the harvest” (Mt 13:29). And, you see, James realizes this. As the wheat and weeds are growing, especially earlier in the season, they can be hard to distinguish.
The agony of double-mindedness
And that’s why James, knowing there could be false disciples in the church, continually addresses these people as brothers. James gives them the benefit of the doubt if you will. And I’m thankful he does. He doesn’t for a moment suggest that double-mindedness necessarily means we are not really Christians. In fact, he’s addressing a universal problem. At the start of this series, I quoted from David Gibson, who said:
Everyone reading these lines will know what it is like to say and do things that can leave us on the other side of our words and actions utterly bewildered about where those choices came from. How could we have been so stupid, so selfish? What on earth made us speak like that? Creatures made in God’s image we may be, but sin renders us absurd even to ourselves.
We all find ourselves saying and doing things at times that make us think, Why did I say that? Why did I do that? I know better. I want to do better. Who am I? Well, according to Paul in Romans 7, you are a Christian still contending with your sinful flesh. J.B. Phillips paraphrases the passage in Romans 7 this way:
My conscious mind whole-heartedly endorses the Law, yet I observe an entirely different principle at work in my nature. This is in continual conflict with my conscious attitude, and makes me an unwilling prisoner to the law of sin and death. In my mind I am God’s willing servant, but in my own nature I am bound fast, as I say, to the law of sin and death. It is an agonising situation, and who on earth can set me free from the clutches of my sinful nature? I thank God there is a way out through Jesus Christ our Lord.
“It is an agonising situation,” Phillips says. In the original text, Paul writes, “What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?” (Ro 7:24). We’ve all felt this frustration, haven’t we?
I often think about Peter. He made a lot of blunders in his day. I have no doubt he was sincere. I have no doubt he was trying to follow Christ faithfully, but he misspoke quite often. And I’ve wondered how he felt in those moments. What did he feel when he spoke up, believing he was saying the right things for the right reasons, only to have Christ rebuke him?
Well, we know how he felt on at least one occasion. After he denied Jesus three times and remembered how the Lord had predicted this, we’re told, “He broke down and wept” (Mk 14:72). It broke his heart to break the Lord’s heart through his disobedience and disloyalty.
Greasy words?
And perhaps Peter is a good example for our subject today. If anything is going to reveal our double-mindedness, our fractured hearts, it will be our tongues. It will be our speech. It will be the words we speak, especially when we speak impulsively without forethought. You know, we can conceal a lot about ourselves even from ourselves, but the tongue— Oh, boy. The tongue can betray us before we even know what’s happening.
I remember an episode of The Andy Griffith Show in which a woman ran for city council. But Andy thought the idea of a woman running for city council was silly, and he said so. Well, as soon as he realized he had offended the woman, he was quick to apologize and said, “I’m sorry. That’s just one of those greasy words that slips right out of the mouth.”
And that’s how we’d like to think of our words, isn’t it? When we say the wrong thing, we act surprised, as though we can’t believe what came out of our mouths. That’s not me, we think. I can’t believe I said that.
Well, according to the Bible, there is a direct and immediate connection between the heart and the mouth. Jesus said, “What comes out of the mouth comes from the heart” (Mt 15:18). Our words speak from the heart. Our words can be a reflection of our character that we can’t easily disguise. So, our tendency is to act as though our words don’t really matter that much. They’re just words. Sticks and stones may break bones, but words are harmless. But that’s not what the Bible teaches. That’s not what James teaches.
In fact, James mentions the tongue in every chapter of his epistle. In chapter 1, he says, “My dear brothers, understand this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger” (Jas 1:19). Then, he says, “If anyone thinks he is religious without controlling his tongue, his religion is useless and he deceives himself” (Jas 1:26).
In chapter 2, he says, “Speak and act as those who are to be judged by the law of freedom” (Jas 2:12).
In chapter 4, he writes, “Don’t criticize one another, brothers. Anyone who defames or judges a fellow believer defames and judges the law” (Jas 4:11).
Then, in chapter 5, he writes, “Above all, my brothers, do not swear, either by heaven or by earth or with any other oath. But let your ‘yes’ mean ‘yes,’ and your ‘no’ mean ‘no,’ so that you won’t fall under judgment” (Jas 5:12).
Then, of course, we have chapter 3, in which James devotes the first twelve verses to this subject. I’ll read them. If you want to follow along, turn with me to James chapter 3.
Not many should become teachers, my brothers, because you know that we will receive a stricter judgment. For we all stumble in many ways. If anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is mature, able also to control the whole body. Now if we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we direct their whole bodies. And consider ships: Though very large and driven by fierce winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. So too, though the tongue is a small part of the body, it boasts great things. Consider how a small fire sets ablaze a large forest. And the tongue is a fire. The tongue, a world of unrighteousness, is placed among our members. It stains the whole body, sets the course of life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. Every kind of animal, bird, reptile, and fish is tamed and has been tamed by humankind, but no one can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With the tongue we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in God’s likeness. Blessing and cursing come out of the same mouth. My brothers, these things should not be this way. Does a spring pour out sweet and bitter water from the same opening? Can a fig tree produce olives, my brothers, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a saltwater spring yield fresh water. (James 3:1-12)
The power of death and life
As I prepared to talk about this, I went to my personal database of the quotes I’ve saved over the years. Ironically enough, I have a lot of words saved about the danger of words. And here’s what John MacArthur said in his commentary on the book of James. He said:
The tongue is you in a unique way. It is the tattletale on the heart and discloses the real person. Not only that, but misuse of the tongue is perhaps the easiest way to sin. There are some sins that an individual may not be able to commit simply because he does not have the opportunity. But there are no limits to what one can say, no built-in restraints or boundaries. In Scripture, the tongue is variously described as wicked, blasphemous, foolish, boasting, complaining, cursing, contentious, sensual, and vile. And that list is not exhaustive. No wonder God put the tongue in a cage behind the teeth, walled in by the mouth!
So, while we’d like to think of our words as not that big of a deal, Scripture says otherwise. And this is true for at least two reasons. First of all, as MacArthur says, “The tongue is you in a unique way. It is the tattletale on the heart and discloses the real person.” The tongue reveals our character for better or worse.
And second, the tongue is far more dangerous than we care to admit. Proverbs 18:21 says, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue.”
In his book, Encouragement: Oxygen of the Soul, Derek Bingham tells the story of a body found floating in a river. This person had committed suicide and attached a note to herself to explain why she had done it. But the note had only two words: “They said.” Now, we don’t know what “they said,” but evidently, Proverbs was right. “Death and life are in the power of the tongue” (Pr 18:21).
Bingham goes on to write, “Do we realize what a word from our tongues can do? It can wreck a local church, mar a child for life, disrupt the harmony of a business office, and destroy a marriage.”
Well, according to James here in chapter 3, the tongue is, first of all, a very small member of the body, but it can also be very destructive.
Second, the tongue is very difficult to bring under control.
And third, the tongue reveals far more about us than we care to admit. And it’s under those three points that I’ll divide this passage. Again, the tongue is small but destructive, the tongue is difficult to control, and the tongue reveals who we are.
Now, having said that, I don’t think the first verse or two fit as neatly as I’d like under those subheadings, so I’ll deal with them separately. We’ll circle back.
The tongue is small but destructive
Verse 3:
Now if we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we direct their whole bodies. And consider ships: Though very large and driven by fierce winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. So too, though the tongue is a small part of the body, it boasts great things. Consider how a small fire sets ablaze a large forest. And the tongue is a fire. The tongue, a world of unrighteousness, is placed among our members. It stains the whole body, sets the course of life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. (James 3:3-6)
So, according to James, if we manage to control our tongues, we shouldn’t have much of a problem with anything else. A small bit in a horse’s mouth allows a person to control the direction of the entire horse. A small rudder can steer a massive ship even through strong winds. Well, similarly, he says, “Though the tongue is a small part of the body, it boasts great things” (Jas 3:5).
Look back at verse 2. “If anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is mature, able also to control the whole body” (Jas 3:2). Now, I don’t think the point is that the tongue literally controls the rest of the body. In fact, we can find many examples in the Bible or our own experiences that show how people can speak deceptively. They can speak one way and act another. But one who manages to control his tongue stands a pretty good chance of controlling the rest of himself. It’s a sign of one’s maturity. We’ll come to this, but the tongue tends to be the hardest part of us to control. So, if we can manage to control it, we can probably control the rest of us.
Now, what does James mean by “boasts great things”? (Jas 3:5). How does the tongue boast great things? Well, there’s a sense in which the tongue can be used for good things—words that build up, encourage, or comfort others. What did Proverbs 18 say? “Death and life are in the power of the tongue” (Pr 18:21). But given the context, it would seem James is primarily thinking about the tongue’s destructive power. It is a very small member of the body, but it can boast great things because it can have a tremendous impact, especially relative to its size.
And James provides a very vivid illustration here. “Consider how a small fire sets ablaze a large forest” (Jas 3:5). How many thousands of acres have burned uncontrollably because someone tossed a cigarette butt onto the side of the road? I remember reading about the great Chicago fire in 1871. Nearly 18,000 buildings burned. Three hundred people died. More than 100,000 were left homeless. Horatio Spafford, author of the hymn “It Is Well With My Soul,” lost a small fortune in that fire. And as it happened, the fire all started with a cow kicking over a lantern.
But that’s the danger of fire. It has the ability to grow and consume everything around it. As long as it can touch something flammable and continues to get oxygen, it can sustain itself. It doesn’t run out of energy. It doesn’t get tired. It doesn’t get distracted. It just burns and burns.
Well, “the tongue is a fire. The tongue, a world of unrighteousness, is placed among our members. It stains the whole body, sets the course of life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell” (Jas 3:6).
By the way, it’s not too surprising that James is often compared to the book of Proverbs in the Old Testament. This chapter is a great example of that. How many times does the book of Proverbs use these kinds of illustrations to show us how dangerous the tongue is? Personally, I made a list of thirty-one verses from Proverbs that warn about how we speak, and I probably missed some. I’ll give you just a few examples.
Proverbs 15:28: “The mind of the righteous person thinks before answering, but the mouth of the wicked blurts out evil things.”
Proverbs 16:27: “A worthless person digs up evil, and his speech is like a scorching fire.”
Proverbs 26:20 and 21: “Without wood, fire goes out; without a gossip, conflict dies down. As charcoal for embers and wood for fire, so is a quarrelsome person for kindling strife.”
Ten types of destructive speech
Now, after I made my list from Proverbs this week, I also made a list of the various types of speech that the Bible defines as destructive. I made a list of ten, and they are:
- Gossip—that is, talking about people behind their backs. You say something about them you would never say to their face.
- Flattery—that is, praising someone insincerely. You say something positive to someone, but you don’t really mean it.
- Slander—that is, making false or damaging statements about someone.
- Lying—saying something that isn’t true for whatever reason.
- Harsh words—that is, speaking in a way that is unkind or hurtful.
- Boasting—bragging about yourself. James talks about this in chapter 4.
- Quarreling—that is, engaging in unnecessary arguments.
- Cursing—using profane or offensive language.
- Deceptive words—that is, intentionally misleading others. Now, deceptive words may involve lies, but we may also deceive by merely withholding the truth.
- False witness—that is, bearing false testimony against someone.
So, there are numerous ways our tongues can be used to destroy, just like a fire. And the destruction can be far-reaching—much farther than we usually intend.
James says, “The tongue is a world of unrighteousness” (Jas 3:6). There’s a whole universe (kosmos) of potentially destructive power in our mouths. In Psalm 57, David laments, “I am surrounded by lions; I lie down among devouring lions—people whose teeth are spears and arrows, whose tongues are sharp swords” (Ps 57:4). That’s quite the image.
It makes me think of my children when they’re trying to carry around a broom or something that’s taller than they are. Everyone in the vicinity needs to watch out. They’re swinging that thing every which way. But, of course, they don’t realize the threat they pose. As far as they’re concerned, they’re holding a broom. There’s nothing dangerous about a broom.
And the same is true for our tongues. The tongue isn’t evil in and of itself, but it has tremendous potential. When one of the kids is swinging that broom around, we say, “Watch out. Be careful.” And regarding our tongues and our speech, the Bible says, “Watch out. Be careful. You have a world of unrighteousness in your mouth” (Jas 3:6).
James says, “It stains the whole body” (Jas 3:6). Like a fire, its destruction can spread. It can permeate everything about us. Jesus said, “What comes out of a person is what defiles him” (Mk 7:20).
Speech can make life a blazing hell
James continues, “It stains the whole body, sets the course of life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell” (Jas 3:6). J.B. Phillips says, “It can make the whole of life a blazing hell.” As much as we’d like to think those “greasy words that slip right out of the mouth” can be put back in with no damage done, James says think again. Words have the power to destroy people, not to mention families, churches, workplaces, and entire communities.
Now, what does James mean by “set on fire by hell”? (Jas 3:6). You know, James is the only person in the New Testament outside of Christ to use this word—hell or Gehenna. It’s a word that literally refers to the Valley of Hinnom, which was essentially a trash dump outside of Jerusalem. This is where people dumped trash, dead animals, and even the bodies of criminals to be burned. In the Old Testament, it was a place where the Canaanites sacrificed their own children to the false god Molech. So, Jesus picked up this imagery and used the word to talk about eternal damnation. The Gehenna fire was always burning. It was a nasty, dreadful place. So, Jesus used this word to talk about eternal damnation or hell.
Well, it may be an awfully strong word, but James says, “If we don’t control our tongues, our lives will be consumed by hellfire.” It will be thoroughly miserable. That’s how dangerous the tongue is.
The tongue is difficult to control
So, the tongue is a very small member of the body, but it can be terribly destructive. Furthermore, it can be very difficult to control. Verse 7: “Every kind of animal, bird, reptile, and fish is tamed and has been tamed by humankind, but no one can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison” (Jas 3:7, 8).
Well, that doesn’t sound too optimistic, does it? No, but that’s kind of the point.
You know, it is amazing to see how mankind has shown his dominion over the earth. I mean, we’ve built massive cities where a wilderness once stood. We’ve cultivated the earth for all kinds of resources, including food, medicine, and building materials. We’ve domesticated and trained the wildest of animals. There seems to be no limit to what we can do, and yet we can’t even tame our own tongues.
It’s really been this way ever since sin entered the world. After Adam and Eve sinned in the garden, the Lord confronted them and asked, “Did you eat from the tree that I commanded you not to eat from?” (Ge 3:11). And how did Adam respond? “Yes, Lord, I have sinned.” No, he quickly pointed to Eve and said, “The woman you gave to be with me — she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate” (Ge 3:12). Now, that may have been technically true, but what was Adam really doing? He was trying to shift the blame to her. From the very start, humanity proved unable to tame the tongue (Jas 3:8).
“No one can tame the tongue,” James says (Jas 3:8). So, where does that leave us? What hope do we have in this regard?
Well, that’s the challenge of reading James. At times, it can feel like the book of James is all law and no gospel. But that’s actually far from true. We’ll come back to this in the future, but James thoroughly believes there is hope. There is a cure for our divided hearts. There is an antidote for our double-mindedness. There is a way to tame the tongue. But if we’re looking to ourselves for the solution, we’re looking in the wrong place. Chapter 4:
God gives greater grace. Therefore he says:
God resists the proud
but gives grace to the humble.Therefore, submit to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Be miserable and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you. (James 4:6-10)
In chapter 5, he says, “The Lord is compassionate and merciful” (Jas 5:11).
You see, there is gospel in the book of James. No, we can’t tame the tongue on our own, but God, who is compassionate and merciful, certainly can (Jas 3:8; 5:11). Furthermore, he will. “Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you” (Jas 4:8).
The tongue reveals who we are
So, the tongue can be very dangerous and very hard to control. And in these last verses, James shows us just how revealing the tongue can be. Again, “the tongue is you in a unique way. It is the tattletale on the heart and discloses the real person.”
Verse 9:
With the tongue we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in God’s likeness. Blessing and cursing come out of the same mouth. My brothers, these things should not be this way. Does a spring pour out sweet and bitter water from the same opening? Can a fig tree produce olives, my brothers, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a saltwater spring yield fresh water. (James 3:9-12)
Our tongues were made to bless God. We see this frequently throughout the Psalms. Psalm 51, for example, says, “Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise” (Ps 51:15). That is precisely what we are to do with our tongues. We are to praise God. We are to bless him.
But once again, James notes a glaring inconsistency. He sees people using their tongues to praise God on Sunday, but then they use the same tongues to curse people on Monday (Jas 3:9). This is essentially what Peter did when he denied Christ. In one instance, he happily confesses that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of the living God (Mt 16:16). But then, when Jesus was arrested, he started to curse and to swear with an oath, “I don’t know the man!” (Mt 26:74).
Now, we might be tempted to argue that James isn’t talking about cursing God or cursing Christ. He’s talking about cursing people. And that’s true, but it makes just as little sense. These people we are talking about are image-bearers of God. James says these are “people who are made in God’s likeness” (Jas 3:19). They are his creation. In fact, they are his most special creation. He designed them to bear his likeness, to share some of his attributes and characteristics.
Now, it’s interesting that James doesn’t cite any biblical references. He doesn’t immediately go to the Old Testament and say, “Here’s what the law says.” Instead, he writes, “My brothers, these things should not be this way” (Jas 3:10). The ESV says, “My brothers, these things ought not to be.” James doesn’t feel it’s even necessary to quote a command of God. “This is practically self-evident,” he says. “You should know better. It doesn’t make any sense to think we can rightly bless God one moment and curse his image-bearers the next. These things ought not to be, and you know it.”
In The Pilgrim’s Progress, I believe it’s the man named Talkative who’s described as “a saint abroad, and a devil at home.” It’s an evil kind of double-mindedness. It’s a complete lack of integrity. And James says, “These things should not be this way” (Jas 3:10).
Then, he returns to his simple illustrations. “Does a spring pour out sweet and bitter water from the same opening? Can a fig tree produce olives, my brothers, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a saltwater spring yield fresh water” (Jas 3:11, 12). As Jesus said, “A good tree can’t produce bad fruit; neither can a bad tree produce good fruit. … So you’ll recognize them by their fruit” (Mt 7:18, 20).
In short, whatever it is that comes out of our mouths—in private or in public, impulsively or not—reveals something about our hearts. It reveals something about who we truly are. As the Puritan Thomas Brooks said, “We know men by their talking.”
What do we enjoy talking about the most? What do we say about people when they’re not around to hear it? What’s the first thing out of our mouths when someone cuts us off on the highway or we stub our toe? We may not especially enjoy this facet of self-examination, but the things we say reveal something very telling about ourselves, and we should pay attention. Our words serve as a pretty good measuring stick for our hearts.
Not many should become teachers
So, perhaps we can now understand why James says what he says at the start of this chapter. “Not many should become teachers, my brothers, because you know that we will receive a stricter judgment. For we all stumble in many ways” (Jas 3:1).
It makes sense that teachers would be held to a higher standard because their errors do not remain with them. They spread those errors through their teachings. They’re an obvious example of words being potentially destructive and far-reaching.
Now, James readily confesses that we all stumble in many ways (Jas 3:1). No one is perfect. So, for that reason, we shouldn’t be too quick to take on a teaching position. If we all stumble, why put yourself in a position to be judged with greater strictness for it—unless, of course, God has clearly called you into that position? And if he has, we should realize that it’s something to be taken very seriously.
No one can tame the tongue?
But notice verse 2 again. “If anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is mature, able also to control the whole body” (Jas 3:2). So, we may all stumble, yet James acknowledges that maturity is possible (Jas 3:1). We can grow. Our tongues can be sanctified. By God’s grace, the tongue can be tamed.
Today, however, I will leave things somewhat unresolved. Once we come to chapter 4 of this study, we will really see how James is doing more than pointing out our problem—that is, double-mindedness. We will see that he is actually leading us toward the solution.
For now, just know that we cannot overcome this problem on our own. In fact, it’s quite dangerous to think we can. Regarding the tongue, James says it as plainly as possible. “No one can tame the tongue” (Jas 3:8). But remember that what is impossible with man is possible with God (Lk 18:27).