The Great Toilet Paper Roll Conspiracy
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On only a few occasions has my wife had the opportunity to replace the toilet paper roll since we’ve been married. I’m home a lot more than she is and, frankly, I’m in the bathroom more. So, she’s only replaced the roll a few times which seems to have a direct correlation with the number of times I have went into the bathroom to find this…
toilet paper roll on backwards
Yes, it is most certainly on backwards. This method of dispensary was originally concocted by an oligarchy of mothers to limit the toilet paper usage of unsuspecting family members as it more difficult to pull from the roll without prematurely tearing when the end hangs down the back–away from the porcelain throne.
Now, I’m not a big government, pro-regulations kind of guy, but there should be a law banning this particular toilet paper disposition. I think a fair punishment would be beheading. After all, this is America–land of the free. I reserve the right to use as much toilet paper as I want without inconvenience. I wish to live in a nation where I am able to clog the toilet through my own recklessness and employ, at times, the help of my plunger. Is that too much to ask?
what your toilet paper says about you
To be honest, I am mostly “reckless, incorrigible, and lazy”.
About The Author
Jeremy Sarber
I'm the pastor of one of the most blessed churches in all the world. I'm married to the most wonderful woman to walk the face of the earth. I'm host of possibly the most unconventional podcast on the Internet. I am thankful because I deserve none of it. Twitter | Facebook | Google+ | LinkedIn | Email
